Conflicted

=S The title says it all.

I’m conflicted, people! I honestly don’t know if what I did was right or wrong, and there’s a niggling part of my conscience that just. won’t. go. away.

This is the second time it’s happened. I was walking through town — y’know, minding my own beeswax — when a person approached me and asked for spare change. Now, coming from the Philippines, my experience with people who asked for money in the streets tells me to just ignore and walk away as fast as you can. My grandparents explained to me that it’s illegal to ask for money from strangers, and an ex-teacher of mine explained that if they’re begging you for money, then just give food instead so that the money won’t be spent on drugs or whatever.

But this isn’t the Philippines. England isn’t a third world country, and just looking at the guy who asked me for spare change told me enough that he was not starving for food. It didn’t help that he was seated at the front steps of the church I go to, so a part of me is feeling very conflicted.

Should I have given him the few coins in my purse, or was I correct to have just walked away?

I feel bad, really, because I knew if I were in that situation, I would be madder than mad that the person I approached rebuffed my pleas. It was rude, selfish and greedy. But still, with the etiquette that I grew accustomed with, shouldn’t my behaviour be forgiven?

Well, I have no idea… hence the conflicted feelings spinning inside me.

Oh well. I’m off to do homework…

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2 thoughts on “Conflicted

  1. That’s always a really tough decision to have to go through… I feel the same conflicting emotions whenever I drive past one of our malls and there’s someone at the corner of the street asking for change.

    If I was approached by someone on the street, I think I would have walked past, gone to the nearest store/fast food place and just bought him something to eat. It’s what my father always does, so I figured it would be the best course of action.

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